Making the Most of "You"

Are you reaching your maximum potential? We often try to be our best, but we run into obstacles along the way. These obstacles come in the form of limitations on our finances, skills, mental capacity, health, or opportunities. Sometimes we wish to ourselves that "if only I didn't have this or that limitation, then I'd really reach my maximum potential". We look at how others don't have the limitations we face, and we credit them with achieving more based on their increased opportunity. After all, if we had what they have then we'd do things better than they do, right?

We are a unique combination of our soul, spirit, and body:

"Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete, without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ." - 1 Thessalonians 5:13

I am not sure of the details or mechanisms, but somehow we are innately born with predispositions in each of these areas. That same soul, spirit, and body is refined and reworked by our experiences and how we react to them. You may have problems with anger because it's in your DNA, or you may get angry just because you saw your parents or friends react that way when you were growing up, or you may just like the feeling that anger gives you. The same could be said of your happiness, creativity, thoughtfulness, and other parts of your personality. How much of "you" is encoded in your DNA, how much has been bolted on by your upbringing, and how much of it is developed by you? There is "nature", "nurture" and then finally our reaction to those two parts. We can really only control that 3rd part (our reactions) which is where our area of responsibility lies.

So I'd like you to imagine that someone was born with your precise DNA, brought up in the same household environment you lived in, and had the same friends you had. Would they have made the same choices you did, or would they have chosen differently? If that person were standing right next to you, would they have scars where you do or carry the baggage that you carry? Would that person "coast" based on a God-given talent they have, or would they push themselves to develop it further? Thinking this way helps me see what I should really make of myself.

God has given me the DNA that I have and has granted me with the family and friends I have. What I do with those blessings (or limitations) is dependent upon me. This leads me (and hopefully you as well) to acknowledge and work around limitations that were placed in our lives beyond our control. It also hopefully leads us to continually push ourselves to develop in areas that are already satisfactory (ie: we shouldn't be satisfied with a mere passing grade in life).

Jesus is the standard by which we should measure ourselves, and we all fall short (Romans 3:23). He gave us a goal to aim for: to be the most God-like person we can be, to bring glory to God and honor him by becoming like him. Recognize areas where you fall short, so that they can be improved if God grants you the time to improve them. Identify areas where you can grow to be closer to Jesus' example. In summary, make the most of "you" that you can with the DNA and upbringing that God has blessed you with.

The Race No Man Wins

This past week I learned that a faithful man I greatly respect was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. It was a shock to me, as it was to many others who heard this news. I have prayed for healing, but we all know that praying for something doesn't guarantee it will happen. We know God can heal completely, but will he?

A prayer for healing is really a prayer for time. Time is a finite resource that each of us gulps down at the same rate and with the same fervor. How many seconds will comprise my lifetime? No matter how many they are, I will certainly pray to God for several more. There is never enough time.

The race against time is the race no man can win. We try to eat healthy, exercise regularly, live a clean lifestyle, and avoid dangerous activities all to prolong our time on the earth. God grants us answers to prayers for health, but he doesn't do so indefinitely. Like the race between the tortoise and the hare, eventually the methodical plodding of time will overtake every mortal soul. At one point in every person's life, they ask God to sustain their life and God responds with "no more". Will today be my time?

Physical life is a process of growth and decay. Our bodies are constantly undergoing both of these processes simultaneously from the moment we are born. To see this, look no further than your hair and fingernails: they are dead cells which constantly ooze out of our bodies and need to be maintained. Muscles grow through the strain of lifting followed by a period of regrowth. The collection of cells which makes up your body today were mostly not there several years ago. We are constantly growing and constantly dying. Our bodies die when the death overcomes the growth.

A great deception is that we start thinking that just because we see growth, death is no longer waiting for us. God said with certainty to Adam "you will surely die" (Genesis 2:17) when sin took its foothold in the world through disobedience. Satan tries to deceive us as he did Eve by muttering "you will not surely die" (Genesis 3:4). We start thinking that if we take care of ourselves, get good health insurance, and plan for retirement then we can avoid a confrontation with death. "Sure", we think, "after I've done everything I need to do, then death can come". But when is it ever the right time? When are we ever done?

We always think to ourselves that we'll die later in life, but don't want to admit that one day "later" will become today. Value each today that God gives you: the breath in your lungs, the blood in your veins, the food in your belly, and the thoughts in your mind. Use the gift of today to accomplish something of lasting value.

Just as people are destined to die once, and after that to face judgment, so Christ was sacrificed once to take away the sins of many; and he will appear a second time, not to bear sin, but to bring salvation to those who are waiting for him.

- Hebrews 9:27-28

Sermon Handouts

Many of you may already know that I occasionally teach sermons at church. I have presented my first talk in 1993 or 1994, which means that this year marks the 20-year mark for me as a teacher. Over the years I have developed my own speaking style, but it is largely based upon speakers which I felt were very effective at communicating information to me. I presumed that if I connected with a speaker's style, then other people would connect with me if I did the same. That's based on an incorrect assumption that all audience members have the same listening style, but it seems to have worked well enough.

The past few years I have been speaking, I've developed handouts for each sermon. I find that a handout has several benefits:

• It forces me to structure my thoughts well enough to convey them in written format.
• It helps clarify which parts of the sermon are interpretation and which are scripture.
• If a listener's mind goes on a tangent or their kids distract them, it gives them the ability to pick up the parts of the sermon that they missed.
• It gives listeners a reference for later, in case they'd like to think about it again or study further.

In a future blog post, I can explain a little about the structure of the handouts that I use. If you'd like to see the handout I made for the sermon I presented yesterday, click here.

Meet Mack Jeffries

Tonight we'll be having a party at our house. Last night, Alisha decorated our front window with some cutouts that she made from black poster board. She based the silhouettes on a decorated piece of paper we had from last year. We backlit the window with a vintage 4-light setup (which we are actually selling):

I dressed up for work. My character was originally going to be a workout guy well past his prime in the 80's, but then I remembered that I had a playground ball in the garage. The new character is named "Mack Jeffries" and he's brimming with confidence left over from his glory days at the top of the semi-pro dodgeball circuit:

Bills of Sin

It took a while for all of the bills for Roscoe's medical care to roll in, but I think that by now we've finally received most of them. Thankfully, it looks like none of them will need to be paid. To my memory, we haven't even been asked to pay our deductible. We're still missing the bill from Kaiser for April - June 2014, but ignoring that we had a total of a little over $2 million for his care through mid-April 2014 (as you can see here).

Since then we've received many bills from UCSF for his care for June - July 2014. In this stack of UCSF bills, here are some of the larger amounts:

Almost a million:

Another million:

A fancy house:

A moderate house:

And then his midnight helicopter ride ...

These bills from June and July 2014 at UCSF totalled to another $2,697,477. Though we don't have the Kaiser bill for Roscoe's NICU stay from mid-April to June 2014, we can safely assume it would have exceeded $300,000 (since previously his February to mid-April stay was over $600,000). This means his total hospital bills would have exceeded $5 million.

What astounds me is how much debt we'd have incurred, with nothing to show for it except our memories. I can't describe how strongly this relates to forgiveness in my mind. As I thumbed through the pages of bills, I'd see amounts of a few hundred dollars, followed by a few thousand. Those amounts were insignificant compared to the hundreds of thousands on the bills shown above, yet they still would have taken sizable chunks out of our savings.

A bill is a record of something that occurred, along with the price you need to pay for that occurrence. This is true whether it's phone service, auto repair, or medical care. As I flipped past each bill, I thought to myself that this is how my sins must look. I have some big ones and also some that are less significant by comparison. It made me wonder if, once I reach heaven, I will be asked to thumb through the pages and volumes of sin "bills" that I've accumulated. How would something like that feel?

I recognized several doctors' names on Roscoe's bills, which means I could correlate the amount being billed with the day when it occurred. In the same way, I imagine that when looking at the bills of my sin, I would be able to remember the exact time and place where it occurred. I'd remember what situation I got myself into, how I responded in a way that I shouldn't, and perhaps what I did to cover it up. Despite the fact that it would be a distant memory, the bill would still remain. What would it feel like to hold a record of that debt in my hands?

This reminds me of the parable of the two debtors, recorded in Luke 7:41-43:

"Two people owed money to a certain moneylender. One owed him five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. Neither of them had the money to pay him back, so he forgave the debts of both. Now which of them will love him more?”

Simon replied, “I suppose the one who had the bigger debt forgiven.”

“You have judged correctly,” Jesus said.

The total of your sin is always increasing. Each time we sin, it adds another bill to our pile with no savings from which to repay that debt. The only option we have is forgiveness. The only way we can be forgiven is by joining ourselves to Christ (Romans 6:3-7). While we remain in Christ, we remain free and forgiven.

If you are like me, this thought makes you hold tighter to Jesus and the forgiveness he carries. My experience with my own son has taught me to appreciate the Son of God: the man who died with no debt to pay the debt that we incurred.

The Golden Rule

Recently, I attended a church meeting where the speaker talked about the golden rule. He pointed out how some people live by the iron rule ("might makes right") or the silver rule ("do no wrong"), but fail to live by the golden rule. It re-ignited my passion for this simple, yet profound scripture:

"So in everything, do to others as you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets"

- Matthew 7:12

There is great wisdom wrapped up in these 23 words. A while ago I saw a presentation given by a man who was an expert student on this concept. He highlighted several details I would not have otherwise noticed. It's by looking at the details of this passage that the true beauty of its design stands out, like seeing the beauty of a flower by examining its individual petals.

1. Act First
   Verb tense matters. The verse says that we should act first ("do", present tense) in regard to righteousness. Our action should precede that of someone else ("as you would have them do", future tense). If we are responding to someone else's action, then we are not following the golden rule. We need to be the first one to act in righteousness.
2. Act Regardless
   There is a notable absence of outcome mentioned. The verse doesn't say "do to others as you would have them do to you, and then stop if they don't do likewise". In fact, the verse mentions nothing of the other person's response. It only says that today we should act towards others as we want them to act toward us tomorrow. Tomorrow, we act toward them as we want them to act towards us the day after. Each day we act in kindness towards others, regardless of how they have responded in the past.
3. Put Yourself in Their Shoes
   This is an unstated concept that could be easily overlooked. The verse literally says we should do to others what we want them to do to us, but that's not precisely what it means. The verse is asking us to put ourselves in someone else's situation and act toward them how we'd want to be treated if we were in that situation. For instance, consider this story:
   

   There once lived a monkey and a fish. The monkey followed the golden rule, always trying to treat others as he wanted to be treated. But he sometimes applied the golden rule foolishly. Now one day a big flood came. As the threatening waters rose, the foolish monkey climbed a tree to safety. Then he looked down and saw a fish struggling in the water. He thought, "I wanted to be lifted from the water." So he reached down and grabbed the fish from the water, lifting him to safety on a high branch. Of course that didn't work. The fish died.

   The golden rule takes effort because it requires us to empathize with the other person. Our empathy is more effective the better we know the person. Therefore, to follow the golden rule we must familiarize ourselves with that other person. They become our focus. This doesn't mean that we do whatever the other person wants, such as feeding kids ice cream for dinner or avoiding difficult conversations which are necessary. What it does mean is that we ask ourselves "What would I want to be said or done for myself, if I were in their exact situation?". Pick a person, ask yourself that question, then go treat that person according to your answer.

I challenge anyone to follow this principle which Jesus taught and not be pleased with the result you see in yourself and the response you receive from others.

Family Resemblance

Alisha's mom texted this picture to Alisha a few days ago. It is a picture of Alisha's mom (Netta) being held as a baby by Netta's father (Burt):

Maybe it's the black and white, but to me she looks quite a bit like Roscoe: